Celtic Banter Archive October 13 2013

13 Oct 2013 12:23:40
When we talked to wee daffys mum she said" he's just a daft wee duck he'd heard that there were new bills arriving every day at sevcoland & he wanted to just try one out, now sevco are saying that if we don't pay the ransom then he'll get sold off to the local chinese takeaway!"
a spokesman for Govan police confirmed" we can confirm that a wee green duck was caught at ibrox & he will be appearing at the sheriff tomorow & that ther'es no truth in the rumour that he was covered in orange sauce as part of some ritual, also a report of this incident has been sent to the procurator fishshoap!"
Ally mcoist had already named wee daffy in his preliminary squad for the trip to the Clyde but withdrew him after consultation with the RSPCA, who would only say,
"yes its true mr mcoist did try to make daffy play but we feel he's been through enough trauma already, he was thoroughly checked over by staff who said that his only problem was that his wee chest was really puffed out with the Celtic crest on it but when released it went back to normal, he had ALL his injections in case he picked anything up across there but seems to be holding up well considering what he's been through, the next 24 hours may be critical, .
disclamer* no animals were hurt during this story
polis wid like tae hear from a mr "wee pat" whos name wiz oan the bottum ae the aforesade duck
a pidgeon & two seagulls your helpin strathy wae oor enquieries

Pure class. H.

13 Oct 2013 09:02:04
Just flicking through old videos of the Bhoys there and some billy no well and came across something a still can't quite beleive. Johnny Doyle crossing the ball against Ayr and it knocks the ref down lol next thing the ref gets up and sends him off f*ck me, and these zombie c*nts have got a cheek to call us paranoid. If a was Doyle ad have knocked him back down again